Only You

Did you know I wrote my suicide note to you? 

I had it written and if I did anything,

I planed on calling you and leaving you the message. 

I didn’t write one to anyone else. 

Not my parents, or my brother, or even my best friend. 

Only to you. 

The night after I told you I cut myself, my psychiatrist asked me

if I thought about killing myself and if I’d written a note to anyone. 

And I said yes, 

to you.

Only you.

I said I didn’t know why.

He asked to read it. 

I let him.

He told me that I was lucky to have someone that I loved so much

and who loved me. 

And my parents, my brother, and my best friends,

they all know how much I love them. 

And if I died I think they’d know.

But if I died without saying goodbye to you,

you’d never know just how much I love you.

I know now why I only wrote to you. 

It’s because I care for you.

So deeply, and I don’t think I could ever die without saying goodbye to you.